“Abandoned property laws” don’t mean what she thought they meant.
Belleview, FL – Move over, Florida Man, because Florida Woman just entered the chat with a bold new scam. Amy Linn Ramirez, 49, decided that instead of going through the hassle of buying a house like a normal person, she’d just… claim one.
The Plot Thickens (Along With the Paperwork)
It all started when a real estate agent showed up for a final walk-through of a home—only to find a handyman changing the locks. Why? Because Ramirez had allegedly hired him, declaring herself the new homeowner. The actual owner? Probably somewhere screaming into a pillow.
But here’s the kicker: Ramirez didn’t just say she owned the house—she filed a fake deed like she was playing Monopoly IRL. When confronted, she hit law enforcement with the classic, “I was just learning about abandoned property laws, bro.”
Spoiler: That defense holds up exactly as well as you’d expect.
The Courtroom Drama
Judge: “So, you thought you could just… take a house?”
Ramirez: “It’s a civil matter!”
Judge: “It’s a felony matter.”
Five years in prison later, Ramirez is probably rethinking her life choices. Meanwhile, the actual homeowner is now triple-checking their property records like, “Did I just hallucinate this whole thing?”
PSA: Don’t Try This at Home (Literally)
Marion County officials are now reminding everyone that property fraud is bad (shocking, we know). They even offer a Property Alert Service so you can get a heads-up if someone tries to pull a Ramirez on your house.
Moral of the story? If you’re going to commit fraud, maybe don’t do it in Florida—where even the judges have seen enough nonsense to last a lifetime.
—TalesFromFlorida.com