By TalesFromFlorida.com
Florida has done it again, folks. Just when you thought the Sunshine State couldn’t possibly out-crazy itself, along comes Tiffany Perkins, a woman who apparently thought stealing electricity was just the first step in her master plan of chaos.
The Setup: Duke Energy Employees vs. The Power Pirate
Two Duke Energy employees showed up at Tiffany’s Lake Wales home because, well, she allegedly decided that paying for electricity was more of a suggestion than a rule. When confronted, Tiffany didn’t just deny it—oh no, that would be too boring. Instead, she went full Florida Woman and released her dogs on them like some kind of budget home security system.
The Plot Twist: The Deputy vs. The Great Dane of Doom
When a deputy arrived to handle the situation, Tiffany called 911 on herself—because nothing says “I’m handling this well” like summoning more cops to your own crime scene. But before the deputy could even say, “Ma’am, you’re under arrest,” one of her Great Danes decided to audition for Cujo 2: Electric Boogaloo and went full attack mode. The poor deputy ended up with injuries to his arm and eye, proving once again that Florida’s wildlife includes more than just alligators—it also includes rogue attack dogs with a grudge.
The Climax: Tasers, More Dogs, and a List of Charges Longer Than a CVS Receipt
Backup arrived, and Tiffany—being the cooperative citizen she is—refused to comply, leading to a taser moment that probably looked like a deleted scene from Reno 911. Meanwhile, deputies discovered a second Great Dane in such bad shape that it looked like it had been living off stolen electricity too. Both dogs were seized, and Tiffany was hit with a charge list so long it could double as a grocery list:
- Aggravated battery on law enforcement (because attacking cops is so 2025)
- Theft of utility services (Florida’s version of DIY energy)
- Animal cruelty (those poor dogs deserved better)
- Misuse of 911 (calling the cops on yourself is next-level)
- And my personal favorite: “Unpermitted landfill” (because why not turn your yard into a trash heap while you’re at it?)
The Moral of the Story?
If you’re going to steal electricity, maybe don’t also keep attack dogs, call 911 on yourself, and turn your property into a health hazard. Just a thought.
Stay tuned for the next episode of Florida: Where Reality Outdoes Fiction Every Time.