St. Petersburg, FL — Noreen McClure’s 93-year-old mom thought she had life on autopilot—literally. Bills? Autopay. Home? Vacant (but checked on). Water usage? Zero. So imagine their shock when the city slapped them with a $10,000 water bill for a house with no leaks, no residents, and not even a goldfish to blame.
“The Meter Doesn’t Lie” — But Neither Does Common Sense
When the bank flagged insufficient funds, Noreen assumed it was a mistake. Then she saw the bill: $4,000 in May, another $6,000 in August. That’s enough water to fill six swimming pools—except the house doesn’t have a pool.
Noreen did what any sane person would do—she hired a leak detective. Spoiler: There was no leak.
Leak Detective Gary Bonar: “I don’t have an answer for it. Unless several neighbors filled their pools… but that’s a LOT of water.”
The city’s response? “The computer doesn’t lie.”
The City’s Solution? “Sue Us.”
Noreen took her case to the Utility Billing Review Committee, where she learned the bill had magically grown to $9,900. The committee’s verdict? Denied. Their advice? “Take legal action.”
Meanwhile, other St. Pete residents are coming forward with similar horror stories, and city council members are finally asking:
Council Member Deborah Figgs-Sanders: “What if we actually messed up? Shouldn’t we, I don’t know, fix it?”
(Revolutionary idea, Deborah.)
How to Avoid a $10K Water Bill for Your Haunted House
- Ditch Autopay – Because trusting the system is how you end up funding the city’s imaginary water park.
- Set Up Alerts – Some utilities will warn you if your house suddenly becomes a water park.
- Demand a Smart Meter – If the city insists the meter is right, at least make sure it’s not from 1985.
For now, Noreen’s mom is stuck fighting the bill—with a pro bono lawyer, because apparently, that’s what it takes to prove water wasn’t teleporting into her walls.
Moral of the story? Florida’s water bills are scarier than its hurricanes.