Posted on TalesFromFlorida.com
When it comes to legendary Florida Man stories, some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness literally written into their obituary. Meet Arthur Nixon Bates IV, a man whose life was so Florida that his obit should be bronzed and displayed in the state capitol.
The Tampa Bay Times recently published Bates’ obituary, and let’s just say… it did not hold back. According to the official send-off, Bates lived a life fueled by “Marlboros, fast women, and Ford Broncos.” If that doesn’t sound like the opening line of a country song, we don’t know what does.
Sadly, Bates passed away on March 5, 2025, reportedly succumbing to his “life of drugs and other life choices.” (Translation: Florida Man was Florida Man-ing hard.)
But the real kicker? His obituary casually mentions that he’s survived by three daughters, all of whom are now left wondering how they’ll cope without their dad’s heartwarming tradition of calling to ask for $20 for cigarettes and methadone.
The internet, of course, had thoughts. Over on Legacy.com, some folks left heartfelt condolences like “a life well lived”—while others kept it real with comments like “He still owes me 20 bucks” and “I would have given you Marlboros.” (Priorities, people.)
In true Florida Man fashion, Bates was cremated in Brandon, and mourners were given the option to plant a tree in his memory—presumably so future generations can sit under its shade and ponder the mysteries of life, like “Why did Dad need so many Marlboros?”
Rest in peace, Arthur. Your legacy of questionable life choices will live on forever in the annals of Florida lore.