WEST PALM BEACH, FL—Date night took a sharp turn for one Florida couple this week when a romantic dinner ended with a bullet instead of dessert.
Gatien Georges, 53, allegedly decided that if his girlfriend of nine years wasn’t going to call the waiter just right, then she wasn’t going to call anyone ever again. According to police, the couple got into a heated argument at dinner—because nothing says love like critiquing your partner’s server-summoning technique.
After storming out like a toddler denied extra chicken nuggets, Georges apparently had a brilliant idea: Why talk it out when you can shoot it out?
The victim, who clearly missed the memo that Florida Man Logic™ doesn’t include rational conflict resolution, went to Georges’ place to grab her stuff. Big mistake. As she sat in her car, minding her own business, Georges decided to play a fun game of “Let’s See If This Gun Works.” Spoiler: It did.
He allegedly pointed the gun at her head, pulled the trigger, and—because Florida Man aim is about as reliable as a flip-flop on I-95—he hit her shoulder instead. The bullet also shattered her driver’s side window, because nothing says “I’m sorry” like property damage.
Miraculously, the victim managed to drive away and call 911, proving once again that Florida women are built different. Meanwhile, Georges tried the classic “But she threatened me first!” defense, claiming she said, “I’m gonna kill you.”
Cops weren’t buying it. Now, Georges faces charges of attempted premeditated murder and a weapons offense—because in Florida, shooting someone over waiter etiquette is frowned upon.
Moral of the story? Next time your date critiques how you order, just walk away. Or, you know, run. Fast.