SPRING HILL, FL—Move over, Breaking Bad, because Florida Man just rewrote the script—this time with more diamonds and way less subtlety.
Pedro Martinez, 54, owner of Three J Jewelers in Hernando County, was allegedly running a side hustle that had nothing to do with gold chains and everything to do with nose candy. That’s right—deputies say this entrepreneur wasn’t just selling ice in the form of diamonds.
“Diamonds Are Forever… But So Is This Cocaine Habit”
According to the Hernando County Sheriff’s Office, Martinez was slinging more than just engagement rings—he was allegedly trafficking cocaine right out of his store. Because why settle for just overcharging for gold when you can also be the neighborhood’s most convenient coke dealer?
Sheriff Al Nienhuis summed it up perfectly: “It’s hard to judge how many people are coming in here legitimately to sell things like their gold jewelry and how many of them are doing it for the drugs.”
Translation: “Was that customer here to pawn Grandma’s necklace or to pick up an eight-ball? Who knows!”
Undercover Cops: The Worst Customers Ever
Deputies got tipped off (probably by someone who was really upset about the quality of their last purchase) and launched a sting operation. Undercover agents reportedly bought drugs at the store four times, because apparently, Martinez had the kind of customer service that keeps people coming back.
When detectives finally raided the place, they found enough coke to make Scarface blush. Martinez was arrested and slapped with a $275,000 bond, because nothing says “Florida justice” like a bail amount that could also buy you a decent yacht.
Neighbors: “We Knew Something Was Up When People Left More Jittery Than Usual”
Christine Munser, who works at Kim’s Trims Salon a few doors down, was shocked—well, as shocked as anyone in Florida can be when they find out their neighbor is running a drug empire.
“You have to feel 100% comfortable,” she said. “This is a walk-in business, and you don’t know what’s going to walk in the door. So, you certainly don’t want that next door.”
Meanwhile, the sheriff pointed out the obvious: running a cash-based illegal drug operation next to a bunch of legit businesses is basically like putting up a neon sign that says “Rob Me, I Can’t Call the Cops.”
The Charges: Because One Crime Wasn’t Enough
Martinez is now facing a laundry list of charges, including:
– Trafficking cocaine (obviously)
– Sale of cocaine (repeat customer discounts, maybe?)
– Possession of a structure with intent to sell drugs (aka “the store”)
– Unlawful use of a two-way communication device (probably texting “U up?” to his buyers at 3 AM)
The Aftermath: Business as Usual?
Despite Martinez’s arrest, the store was already back open by Tuesday. Because in Florida, even a drug bust won’t stop commerce—it just means the next owner has to decide whether to stick to just jewelry or diversify again.
Sheriff Nienhuis did warn that cocaine seems to be making a comeback in Hernando County, which is great news for anyone who missed the 1980s.
So, if you’re in Spring Hill and need a sparkly pick-me-up, maybe just stick to the diamonds this time. Or at least make sure your dealer isn’t also selling engagement rings.