Oh, Florida. Never change.
In the latest episode of “Why Would You Do That?”, a Palm Beach County electrician named Michael A. Falcone decided that his paycheck wasn’t cutting it. So, naturally, he turned to the next logical career move: stealing thousands of dollars’ worth of metal from the very school district that employed him.
The Plot Thickens (Because of Course It Does)
Falcone wasn’t just some random dude sneaking onto school property under cover of darkness. Nope. This guy had style. He allegedly:
✔ Wore his school district uniform and badge while selling stolen copper and brass to a recycling company. (Because nothing says “legit business” like committing crimes in your work clothes.)
✔ Used a district-issued vehicle to transport the goods. (Talk about a company car perk gone wrong.)
✔ Made 18 separate transactions between July 2024 and January 2025, totaling around $4,000 in scrap metal sales. (That’s a lot of effort for what amounts to a really bad side hustle.)
The Big Oops Moment
The School District of Palm Beach County Police Department caught wind of Falcone’s entrepreneurial spirit when the recycling company tipped them off. And here’s the kicker—the stolen metal matched materials used in school scoreboards and light poles. So, yeah, if you were wondering why little Timmy’s football game was suddenly being scored with a whiteboard and a Sharpie… now you know.
When cops showed up to question Falcone, he reportedly confessed immediately—because nothing screams master criminal like folding faster than a cheap lawn chair.
The Consequences (Because Crime Doesn’t Pay… Unless You’re Really Bad at It)
Falcone now faces charges including burglary, grand theft, and criminal mischief—which, let’s be real, is just Florida’s way of saying “You done messed up, buddy.” He’s currently chilling in the Palm Beach County Jail, probably wondering why he didn’t just get a second job at Starbucks like a normal person.
Moral of the Story
If you’re going to steal, maybe don’t:
🔹 Wear your work uniform while doing it.
🔹 Use your employer’s vehicle as a getaway car.
🔹 Sell the stolen goods to a place that keeps records.
But hey, at least he gave us another legendary Florida Man story. Stay classy, Palm Beach.