TalesFromFlorida.com – Because Only in the Sunshine State…
Well, folks, Florida Man is back at it—this time with a fiery family feud that puts even the most dramatic telenovelas to shame. Meet Martin Perez, a 59-year-old Homestead dad who apparently decided that burning down his pregnant daughter’s house was the best way to settle… whatever argument they were having.
The Plot Thickens (Literally, With Smoke)
According to police, Perez allegedly set his daughter Jocelyn’s home ablaze in the wee hours of Sunday morning. Flames? Check. Drama? Double-check. A poor, innocent dog named Loki who didn’t survive the inferno? BRB, SOBBING.
Jocelyn, who is two months pregnant (because Florida Man drama always involves extra layers), arrived at the scene while the house was still burning. And what did Dad do? Naturally, he pushed and scratched her—because why commit just one crime when you can go for the felony combo meal?
The Aftermath: A GoFundMe and a Broken Heart
Jocelyn, now homeless and mourning her beloved pup, took to a fundraising page to share her grief. “My heart, soul, body, and mind shattered in 1 million pieces right now,” she wrote, alongside photos of her charred dream home—which she had just bought in September 2024.
Meanwhile, investigators are still scratching their heads over what could possibly motivate a man to arson his own daughter’s house. Was it an argument over Thanksgiving leftovers? A dispute about who gets the good parking spot at family gatherings? The world may never know.
Florida Man Charges: Now With Extra Spice
Perez is currently cooling his heels behind bars, facing charges of first-degree arson, criminal mischief, and battery on a pregnant woman—because, again, Florida Man never does things halfway.
Moral of the story? If your Florida relatives start eyeing the gasoline can at the next family BBQ… maybe suggest therapy instead.
(Stay tuned for the next episode of “Florida Man vs. Common Sense.”)