Because nothing says “Happy Easter” like assaulting a giant bunny at the mall.
NAPLES, FL—In what might be the most Florida Easter crime ever, three teenagers decided that the true meaning of the holiday wasn’t chocolate eggs or pastel decorations—it was allegedly beating up a poor woman dressed as the Easter Bunny.
According to the Naples Police Department, the teens, ages 13 and 14, ambushed the 24-year-old Easter Bunny performer at Coastland Center mall. Witnesses say the woman was just minding her own business, hopping (okay, probably walking) to the photo area to take pictures with kids when the teens struck.
Because nothing screams “cool” like sucker-punching a mascot.
Two of the teens were charged with battery, while the third got off with a civil citation—probably because even Florida law recognizes that attacking a giant rabbit is technically a crime, but also kind of hilarious in a “what were they thinking?” way.
The Real Question: What was the motive? Did they think the Easter Bunny was hiding extra candy? Were they trying to prove they could take down a mythical creature? Or was this just another day in Florida, where the crime blotter writes itself?
Either way, this story has everything: holiday chaos, questionable life choices, and a reminder that Florida teens will always find a way to make the news.
Stay tuned for next year’s update: “Florida Man Arrested for Stealing Santa’s Sleigh—Claims It Was a Joyride.”